Back in Brussels
by alicemorganss
Summary: She's the agency's best asset and they couldn't help but depend on one another. "I love you," she told him, "I wish I didn't, but I do."


Disclaimer: I own nothing but my ideas. :)

* * *

He made his way into the hotel room, moving quickly to the bathroom door he slammed it shut, turning on the taps, he splashed the cool water on his face in attempt to control his anger. What he wanted to do was smash the mirror in frustration, but he didn't think the agency would like to replace it. So he left it alone, instead ripping the towels from the towel bar and throwing them to the floor. Once he had made a small mess of the bathroom, he sank down onto the floor next to the tub. He took a shaky breath and passed a hand through his hair. As he drew in deeper breaths in attempt to simmer down, he heard a tentative knock on the door.

"Go away" he told the person.

"I can't" a muffled answer came through the door.

He sighed in defeat and watched as the door slowly swung open, a small blonde mass of hair slipped through the crack, the worry in her blue eyes bore a hole right through him. Instantly he regretted what he had done.

She came into the cramped bathroom and cast a quick glance at the attempted mess and sighed to herself.

"Are you here to stop me?" he asked.

"No" she told him, leaning back against the sink adjacent to his position.

"Good" he said, leaning his head back against the tub, rubbing his hands across his temples.

After a few moments of peace, he decided he needed to speak up again.

"Are you here to yell at me, give me orders back home?" he sneered.

"Can I look at the dressing?" she asked, ignoring his question.

"So you can send me home, say I'm unfit for the op" he deduced.

She stayed silent, letting his anger pass right through her.

"The op is done," she told him, "After he shot you, or rather attempted to shoot me, that was the last straw. The agency doesn't like it when one of their best deep cover ops teams is shot at."

He nodded his head and his free hand automatically grazed his side where the bullet had gone through.

She watched him unconsciously move his hand to wear she knew he had taken the bullet meant for her. The bullet that would have most likely killed her if he had not jumped in the way.

"I never got a chance to thank you," she said quietly. "It was a mess, you were put in the ambulance, I had to give my statement to the police, and then they wouldn't tell me anything."

"Don't thank me," he told her, locking his eyes onto hers. "I did it to save the agency's best asset."

"Don't lie to me, Arthur," she said, and he could hear the tears in her voice. "Please, don't."

He looked down at the bathroom floor and the mess he had made, anything to avoid her. He hated when she did this to him.

He got up slowly, careful of the wound on his left side, as he made his way over to where she leaned against the sink.

She looked up at his face as he hovered over her, their bodies only inches apart.

He lowered his mouth so it was just slightly above hers. Touching his lips to hers lightly, she craned her neck upwards to get more contact.

He pushed her against the sink, her back making full contact with the sink and his hips pressed into hers. He kissed her fully on the mouth this time, one of his hands moving to her waist to support him as he leaned into her.

After a few seconds he let go, bringing him backwards to look at her. She had her eyes closed, and her mouth was still partially open, breathing in and recovering the lost air supply.

She opened her eyes slowly, looking into his eyes as he carefully examined her.

"I love you," she told him, "I wish I didn't, but I do."

His eyes widened slightly at this bit of information.

"You're married, Arthur" she said, "You have a wife who is waiting for you back at home, and this is just a fling, not a relationship."

He opened his mouth to say something, but she pressed a finger against his lips, silencing him.

"Don't say anything," she begged.

He nodded in agreement and she released her finger from his lips.

He quickly captured her finger in his grasp and brought their hands together, fingers intertwined tightly.

Kissing her once more, he heard the slight whimper bubble to the surface.

Moving his lips from her lips to her neck, his voice muffled as he spoke to her.

"What if I leave her," he said, kissing the spot where the back of her ear and neck met.

He felt her shiver and she moved her head unconsciously allowing him more access to her neck.

"You don't want to" she stated.

He moved his lips back to hers and kissed her with as much passion he could find.

As she pulled away, breathless, she moved her head to his chest, feeling the pounding of his heart through his clothing.

"The embassy received a package for me today" he began, "It was a stack of papers with a lot of legal jargon. The only thing I got was the sign here yellow post-it notes, and the words irreconcilable differences" he confided in her.

"Arthur" she whispered, turning her face into his chest, absorbing the information he had just told her.

He brought his hand that rested at her waist to cup the back of her head to his chest, angling his head to bury his face in her hair.

The musky smell of sweat, mixed with adrenaline and fear permeated his nose. But behind that smell was a scent uniquely her own. It was a combination of her freshly laundered clothes, her shampoo and perfume. It was a smell he could get lost in, a smell he wanted to get lost in.

Lifting her head from her chest, she fingered the hospital scrub shirt he wore.

"I would like to take a look at that" she told him, looking at his left side.

He loosened the hold her had on her fingers, and she moved both their hands upwards, settling them in between their chests.

Letting his hand go and moving towards the shirt, she felt his fingertips skim her wrist as she moved towards the tail of the shirt.

Reaching the end, she lifted the shirt slowly, careful not to brush along the taped gauze strips at his side.

She saw some blood soaking through the dressing, so she let go of the shirt and watched as it came back down to rest of his waist again.

"Let me get some water and a cloth" she said, moving back to get the ice bucket from the bar, "Go to the bedroom, I'll be there in a minute."

He did as he was told and moved gingerly from the bathroom into the bedroom, standing at the foot of the unmade bed.

When she came back, he was staring at the bed, unmoving. Placing the ice bucket on the floor next to her, she grasped his arm, and gained a tilt of his head as a response.

She moved both hands to the tail of his shirt, gingerly lifting it up and over his head. As he moved his arm up above his head, he let out a hiss, but said nothing, bringing his arms back down slowly as she tossed the scrubs shirt aside.

She moved close to his side, gently removing the tape from his side. Seeing the dried blood, she made a face of shock, but quickly masked it as she felt his eyes drop down to her.

The stitches made a small line across his waist, right above his hip. The dark lines contrasted with the tan of his skin. She removed the tape and the gauze completely, tossing it down on the floor by the ice bucket.

Dipping the washcloth in the water, she rung it out and moved back to his side.

As she brought the moistened cloth to his skin, she felt him watching her every move. Moving one hand to rest on his chest while the other carefully dabbed the dried blood away, she focused on the task at hand.

As the dried blood cleared away with each small swipe, his hands came to rest at her waist, making it hard for her to finish her task.

Pulling a small strip of gauze and medical tape from her back pocket, she set to re-bandage the stitches.

"I don't have any ointment" she told him, "But this should do for now."

He continued to watch her in silence, tracking her movements with his eyes.

She finished her patchwork and ran a hand over his waist, her fingertips brushing the waistband of the jeans he wore.

Silently she moved her hands to the front of his waist, unbuttoning his jeans.

"We should get you out of these" she told him, unzipping the zipper slowly and guiding his jeans down his legs, careful not to jostle his injury.

As the jeans bunched at his feet, she untied his shoes, and loosened them so he could step out of them.

Looking up, she saw that he held out both of his hands to her. Grasping his forearms, she felt his fingers close around hers as well, lifting her to her full height.

Holding his eyes, she saw an overwhelming sadness in them. So, she did what she did best, she tried to make it disappear.

She slowly wrapped one of her arms around him, resting her palm on his shoulders, as she moved in closer to his face, she cupped her palm, sliding it behind his neck as she slowly kissed him on the mouth.

He responded slowly, but then broke the kiss. Instead of leaning in again, he moved his hand to the end of her shirt, grasping it in both his hands on either side of her waist and slowly removed it.

As he tossed it to the side, she looked at him sadly, wanting to say something to him. She moved her lips, but he quickly silenced her, bringing his lips to hers.

She grasped his bicep by the surprise force of his kiss, and her other hand made its way back up to his shoulder, grasping it firmly.

He kissed her lips fully, and then moved to her neck, which she deduced was quickly become one of his favorite spots on her, and she pulled him closer to her, wary of his stitches.

As he nipped at her neck, she granted him more access, leaning her head against his shoulder, gasping slowly as he hit a particularly sensitive spot.

When he heard her intake of breath, he moved back to her lips, effectively silencing her once more.

He released her lips and watched as she slowly opened her eyes, surprised he didn't immediately start to kiss her again. He watched for any sign of hesitation, and seeing none, he slowly moved his hand down her waist, and moved to pick her up.

She wanted to chastise him, tell him that he would rip his stitches and reinjure himself picking her up, but she couldn't find the words. Instead she buried her nose in the crook of his neck, kissing him as he slowly brought her over to the bed and laid her down gently.

He moved to sit beside her, slowly undoing her jeans as she lay on the bed, watching him carefully.

As he removed them, also tossing her shoes and socks aside, he ran his hand along her body as he moved back up to where she lay.

Feeling the silky smoothness of her skin, marred by just the occasional scar, he couldn't help but wonder what she sees in him. As he reaches her face, his hand that had traveled the expanse of her body, carefully cupped her face and titled it towards his.

Kissing her slowly, he felt her body relax fully into the pillows behind her.

As the rest of their clothes came off, she moved to put herself in the dominant position, afraid he would strain his stitches.

Pushing him further into the mattress and mound of pillows, her long blonde hair created a curtain around their faces and she leaned down to kiss him.

Running his hands along her back, he cupped her shoulders as she moved against him slowly.

He noticed how in sync they were, from her subtle movement, to their short breaths, they moved as one.

He swallowed her cry of pleasure as she finally let go, and he had buried himself deep within her before finally letting himself go.

As her strength to hold herself over him weakened, she moved herself to his uninjured side, curling up to his side and intertwining one of her legs with his.

He moved an arm under her head, supporting her head against his shoulder, and gently moved his fingers in her hair, smoothing it and twirling it in his fingertips.

Her hands moved to his stitches, feeling for any potential damage, finding none she moved her hand back to rest on his chest.

He squeezed her shoulders in silent thanks, and he felt her move closer, in what he could only assume was acknowledgment.

As her breathing evened out, he found he couldn't sleep, thinking of everything that had been happening ever since this morning.

In the muted twilight, he brought his hand up to eye level. Feeling the weight of the wedding band against his finger, he realized he didn't feel guilty about anything that had happened.

He wasn't in love with his wife anymore, he was in love with this woman sleeping beside him. The woman who was technically his boss on this operation, the woman whose heart he held in the palm of his hands, the woman who he would protect at any cost.

He decided he would sign the papers first thing in the morning, have them expedited, and move on with his life. Hopefully this woman beside him would wait for him to get his life back on track.

He fell asleep as he laced his fingers with hers, not wanting to let her go with his epiphany.

* * *

Her cell phone rang the next morning, waking the two occupants of the bed.

She lazily stretched against him and he smiled slightly.

"Morning" she whispered into his ear, kissing his collarbone.

"Morning" he said gruffly, turning his head to kiss the top of her head.

She got up from his side, putting on a shirt of his that was on the floor and quickly ran into the bathroom, dispensing with her morning ritual.

He got up slowly, putting his briefs on, he moved to grab a pen from her bag, taking the official papers out of the envelope and signing at every post-it noted line.

As he flipped the papers back to the beginning and shoved them back into the envelope he heaved a sigh of relief, it was done.

He heard the bathroom door open and he placed the envelope back down on the table, he busied himself with pouring her a bowl of cereal. It would have to do until they went to the market next.

"That was Henry," she told him as she walked into the small kitchen, her eyes focused on the phone in her hands.

"What did he want?" he asked, getting the pint of milk from the fridge and pouring it over the Corn Flakes.

"To congratulate me on my success" she said, tossing her phone on his envelope of papers and moving to his side.

She looked over his shoulder and smiled.

"You shouldn't have," she teased.

"Yes, well, I should take care of my nurse" he joked.

She leaned against his side and smiled. Taking the spoon from his hand she dug it into the cereal, eating carefully as his arms encircled her.

The spoon clinked against the bowl as she set it down in the milk, wrapping her arms around his waist she hummed contentedly.

"Joan" he said, looking down at her.

She looked up at him, a question in her eyes.

He moved out of her arms and grabbed her hand, clasping her fingers and he moved them to where the envelope of papers was sitting.

He held out the envelope to her and watched as she looked at the front, seeing his name, she looked up in confusion.

"Open it" he told her.

She did as he asked and her face contorted into many different emotions in the span of seconds.

"What is this?" she whispered.

"Its my divorce papers" he told her, removing the papers from her grasp and setting them down on the table.

She looked at him and he saw tears in her eyes.

"Don't cry, baby" he said, accidentally letting a term of endearment out.

"Don't call me baby" she smiled slightly and laughed, wiping her eyes.

He smiled and took both of her hands into his.

"I want you," he told her, looking her in the eyes. "I realized that long before last night, but last night" he trailed off, "last night just confirmed all of it."

"Arthur, you are emotional. Your head has been messed with" she began. "Seeing me almost get shot, you actually getting shot, its messy and emotional and you aren't supposed to be making any decisions after something like that" she tried to bargain with him.

"Love is messy and emotional," he told her seriously. "What can I do to make you see that?" he asked.

She stayed silent, tears silently falling to her cheeks and she bit her lip nervously.

"Its not a trick, Joan" he said, releasing one of his hands and wiping her tears away.

"I just" she began "I need to know if you and I can work."

"I can't promise that we will" Arthur stated honestly "but I can promise you I'll be damned to let you go without a fight."

"Okay" she said after a few minutes of silent contemplation.

"Okay?" he asked double-checking.

"Okay" she nodded her head.

He smiled and cupped her cheek, kissing her passionately.

As she broke it off, she moved back away from out of his arms, nodding her head for the bathroom.

He released her and grasped one of her fingers as she turned to walk away.

She looked up at him, wondering what he was going to do, as she moved her lips to question him, she stopped.

"I love you," he said.

She smiled brightly as his words washed over her, and he smiled slightly back at her. It was the first time he had uttered these words to her, and she couldn't have been more grateful.

Moving back into him, she kissed him passionately, showing her appreciation of him finally uttering those three words.

She pulled back just as quick and moved away from him again, moving towards the bathroom.

Looking back over her shoulder, she saw Arthur remove his wedding band and put it in the envelope, sealing it shut with the papers inside.

"Hey, Arthur" she said stopping just outside the bathroom door.

He looked up as he set the envelope back down again, watching her.

"Its going to be great" she smiled, watching him smile and blush slightly, she closed the bathroom door.

As he heard the shower start, he smiled to himself.

"Yeah" he said to himself "It's going to be great."

* * *

fin.


End file.
